Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Star Trek: Generations

         Holy hell that movie was bad. I remember watching it in theaters for the first time and even then it didn't seem great. But wow are there some serious plot holes. I will get to those in my summary, but I wanted to start with some of the things that seems to clash with actual TNG. First of all of course the ship looks different. They are using the same sets but it has to be DRAMATIC for a movie so it is way to dark to see anything. Also having Data decide to make Geordi put his emotion chip in is a real jerk move given that it hasn't been all that long since the last time Data had emotions and he tortured Geordi because of it. Also he tortures him with bad jokes in the movie and is probably my least favorite character in the movie. Shatner however seemed to actually remember how to play Kirk and is one of the better parts of this film which I never expected to be typing.
         The film begins with the commissioning of the Enterprise B and it being taken out for a media cruise. Kirk is there along with Scottie and Chekov. But of course there is a crisis that they are THE ONLY SHIP IN RANGE to handle even though they are right at Earth and in no condition to handle it. They arrive in time to save 47 people from the threatened cargo ship but it explodes in the energy ribbon and traps the Enterprise. Kirk has to sacrifice himself to save the ship and gets hit by the ribbon. Cut to the TNG crew for some reason pretending to be on a sea ship to promote Worf/make him go for a swim. Picard gets some grim news and leaves just before a distress signal comes in. A base is under attack but when they arrive they find only a few survivors including Soren (although he is the only survivor shown and presumably any one else who made it would have ratted him out as the reason they were attacked some maybe there weren't any more? Soren was on the cargo ship in the opening and recognizes Guiana in Ten Forward (she was also on the cargo ship). Also somehow Soren convinces Picard to let him back onto the station even though that is obviously a bad idea.
         Data has put his emotion chip in and is busy annoying the hell out of Geordi while they look over the station. They find a hidden compartment full of photon torpedoes but don't report it for no apparent reason. Soren arrives and knocks Geordi out and makes Data cower in fear. He destroys the star in the system and gets away onto a Klingon ship with Geordi. There we see Lursa and B'Tor are the ones behind this, but apparently they are working for Soren and will put up with him punching them. He interrogates Geordi for literally no reason but then again they also don't seem to understand hostages. Data figures out he is going to destroy another star and they rush in. Soren beams down but the Klingons let Picard go with him "in exchange" for Geordi even though they don't get anything out of it. Or do they! They have bugged Geordi's visor and get the shield frequencies and attack. Something about plasma coils and they Enterprise wins (this is the end of the best Klingon villains in the series BTW), but is crippled and the saucer section falls to the planet below. Soren fires his rocket killing all of them.
         Picard finds himself in a Victorian Christmas card with the kids he never had but Guinan's echo tells him he is in the nexus. He convinces Kirk to join him to "make a difference" and they manage to defeat Soren with his sideways gun and stop the destruction of a civilization but Kirk is killed. Picard buries him under a tiny pile of rocks and heads back to the beached Enterprise saucer. After throwing away his priceless artifact from The Chase he grabs his lame hologram bordered photo album and gets out of there.

         Review: I skipped over some of the worst parts in my summary, but trust me you aren't missing anything. If you really want to know go watch RLM (yes, they are part of what inspired me to look back at All the Star Treks). This won't get the worst possible score because I know the TNG movies have even lower to sink.

2 out of 10

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